Man with a Plan

I sold my little white truck last night.

It was a piece of crap and I’m glad to be shed of it. And I’m glad for the measly $70 I got for it because insurance was due and tag renewal was just around the corner. It smoked like crazy, so passing emissions has always been a dramatic event. Well, it always passed, but convincing the attendant that visible smoke didn’t necessarily mean anything is a trick unto itself. That’s $10 a year I won’t owe anymore, and since vehicle registration fees here have gone up something like 60% since last time, I’ll be saving a bundle.

And yet… I miss it already, despite its many, many… er… many problems.

1. It was a third vehicle. As such, it often sat around unused.
2. It was a third vehicle. As such, it got borrowed. A lot.
3. It never got gassed-up when borrowed. Ever. While that was no fault of the little truck itself, it was irritating that I had to fill up the tank every time I had an errand to run. See number 2.
4. It was ugly. I didn’t care that there were always new dings and scrapes whenever it came back from a borrowin’ (see number 2), but it never made the poor vehicle any prettier.
5. Overdrive didn’t work, so I couldn’t drive it on the interstate. Of course, a lot of people did it anyway, and it’s on the interstate where I recently found it broken down, literally 3 hours from being impounded. AAA didn’t cover the full cost of the tow back to my house, but again, not a direct result of the truck’s… er… truckness. See number 2.
6. The reverse gear made an embarassing amount of noise.
7. The air conditioner didn’t work.
8. It smelled funny.
9. It hadn’t run in three months. See number 5.
10. Somebody smashed out the passenger-side window a few nights ago, probably looking for drugs or a gun. The pisser is that I left the doors unlocked to keep that very thing from happening. Since that time I’ve had a tarp wrapped around the door, adding greatly to the visual appeal of my neighborhood. See number 4.
11. There was glass all over the place. See number 10.
12. The vinyl seats were split and peeling. See number 4.
13. The steering wheel was all torn up. See number 2.
14. It had no radio. That, along with the speakers, had been ripped out sometime before my purchase of the “work vehicle.” See number 4.
15. It had a very crappy tinting job, and there were bubbles all over. On the plus side, a lot of broken glass clung to the tinting film and I was able to throw it away as a single piece. See number 4.
16. The window had a huge crack in it. See number 4.
17. I didn’t let my wife drive it because I didn’t think she would survive a collision in it.
18. I didn’t really need it anymore. This should have been reason enough to part with it months ago, but when I decided to sell it, it was borrowed out. I had only had it back for a day or two when it left on its final voyage to 5,000RPM-interstate-travel-land, where it lost all the remaining value I could have otherwise gotten out of it. See number 2.

I’m told it’ll probably be shipped down to Mexico. It’s old-school technology, so I’m sure it will be kept running for many, many years down there.

Vaya con Dios, poco carro blanco!